Rain and more rain

Posted on November 21, 2022 Posted in Sketching, UncategorizedTagged Bug, Cold, Forecast, Rain, Scotland, Sore throat, Tired, Water, Weather, Wet, WinterLeave a comment

It hasn’t stopped raining for the last two days, places in Scotland have had as much rain in a day as they usually have in a month. I’ve kept inside and kept my sore throat and sniffles to myself. I think the weather has bought the bad bugs out. Plus with travelling last week I’ve probably come into contact with other people who have had colds. I did a lateral flow test this morning that was negative, but instead of my usual poor sleep I’ve been totally exhausted. Anyway at this rate I’ll be building an ark!

Upset last night…

Posted on November 7, 2022 Posted in Sketching, UncategorizedTagged Art, Black and white drawing, Drawing, Insomnia, Memory, Poem, Poetry, Sadness, Sketching, Storm, Thought, Tired, UpsetLeave a comment

My eyes flood with tidal waves of tears.

Storm clouds have darkened my brows.

Salt tears course down my cheeks.

Time has flown, she is gone.

My sister – my twin.

Written and drawn at 4am. Things just got to me again and it seemed a good way of expressing myself.

Sore throat time

Posted on November 3, 2022 Posted in UncategorizedTagged Aching, Cat, Cold, Comfort, Illness, Negative test, poached eggs, Sore throat, TiredLeave a comment

Blugh! I feel tired and ill. Still negative for covid but getting fed up with my sore, croaky throat. It’s so annoying and it feels like it’s going on my chest. My body aches. It’s been so long since I’ve had a proper cold or flu, you forget how lethargic it makes you feel. I’m sitting with the cat poddling (kneading) my knee. Ouch, too tired to push him off. But it’s a comfort… And my nose keeps dripping like a tap. Hubby is cooking poached egg on toast. Hooray!

Toast at 4am

Posted on November 3, 2022 Posted in Cat, UncategorizedTagged Awake, Cat, decaffeinated, Grief, Insomnia, Loss, Mourning, Sad, Sleepless, TiredLeave a comment

It’s another one of those nights. I lie down to sleep but my thoughts churn. I’m too hot, then too cold. I tried reading but hubby wants the light out, then he starts to snore. I came downstairs to get a drink, decaffeinated coffee, what a thrill?! I decided to treat myself to a slice of toast with hummus. Not very exciting. I know that at this rate it will be afternoon before I get up. One of the cats is on the armchair next to me, paw over his nose, keeping the light from the standard lamp out of his eyes. Oh to be a cat, curling up wherever you can. Warmed in a fur coat that is totally ethical. The house creaks at night, it’s old and not very well made. I think of my sister late at night. My chest does ache, but it might just be the cold I’ve had for the last few days. I guess I’ve got to learn to live with the loss. I’m still mourning her. Maybe tomorrow night I’ll get a better night’s sleep.

Feeling hot

Posted on October 22, 2022October 22, 2022 Posted in Sketching, UncategorizedTagged Aches, Art, Digital drawing, Doze, Drawing, Illness, Life, Sadness, TiredLeave a comment

It’s a cool day, and we don’t have the heating on, but I feel hot. I’m wearing a jumper so that might be the cause, but my guts ache too. I hope I’m not ill. I haven’t eaten anything strange, I made a nice chicken and pasta meal last night and it was thoroughly cooked. Basically lots of vegetables, some tomato pasta sauce, two small chicken breasts (apologies to vegetarians) and some multi coloured pasta. Tonight we are going to have pizza so I guess I’m in an Italian mood?

Other symptoms? I think the lethargy I’m feeling is still from sadness. It’s taking me a while to get over things. Maybe my immune system is a bit low? Or perhaps that’s just me guessing. Meanwhile life goes on. I’ll get a cup of tea and maybe doze for a while. The cat has just come up to say hello…

Finished Poppy Meditation

Posted on October 18, 2022October 18, 2022 Posted in Fine Art, UncategorizedTagged Acrylic on canvas, Colour, Fine Art, Finished, Flowers, Gardening, Life, Painting, Poppies, poppy meditation, Tired4 Comments

Hard work, but I think it was worth it. I think some of my paintings are like knitting or embroidery, pulling all the threads together to bring it to a finished piece. And sometimes it’s knowing where to stop, to feel satisfied. Sometimes my hubby says I overwork things, but I think I know where I am with this. I decided not to add any bees or butterflies, I think that would just distract.

Will I sleep?

Posted on October 11, 2022October 11, 2022 Posted in UncategorizedTagged Aching, Awake, Dreams, hours, overtired, short time, Sleep, Sleeping, Tired, yawningLeave a comment

Now I lay me down to sleep, will I find the peace I seek? Last night I slept for two hours, stayed awake for three, then caught two more hours by their shirt tails. Dragged into and out of nervous dreams. Unsatisfied by my minds play and twists. I don’t remember them, but I think the dreams woke me, a flavour or a smell or a shape lifting me from slumber. Spending the day tired and aching. Wonder if I will repeat tonight? I hope not, but I’m overtired and grumpy, aching and yawning!

Sleeping arrangements

Posted on October 11, 2022October 11, 2022 Posted in Cat, UncategorizedTagged Bed, Black and white cat, Cat, Sleeping, Sleeping cat, Tired, Tuxedo cat, uncomfortableLeave a comment

One of the cats came and slept on me last night. I don’t know if it was for warmth (probably) or comfort. He lay with his head on my hand and gently purred. The only problem was when I had to get up to go to the bathroom. As I shifted position he moved down by my feet. That was good, so I had a cup of coffee before I went back to bed. But then it was difficult to get back in bed. I tried to slide across the mattress but my feet and knees were bent uncomfortably. The cat didn’t move, so I slowly straightened my legs, but I knew it would come to a point when I would have to push him down the bed. Then our female cat came in the bedroom. She jumped up and the male cat jumped down…. I breathed a sigh and straightend my legs, what a relief !

Tired

Posted on October 3, 2022 Posted in UncategorizedTagged Asleep, Awake, Cold, Hot, Insomnia, reasons, Sleep, Sleepy, Thinking, Tired, TV, Video?, yawningLeave a comment

Yawning, aching, eyes blurred, too many late nights watching TV or videos on my phone. I could sleep, but my feet hurt, which keeps me awake. Then I’m either too hot or too cold, or hubby snores, or kicks my ankle. Too many decaff coffees make it worse. Even if I don’t have lots of thoughts sometimes it difficult. I put a light on, if I read sometimes I can sleep, I hear the book drop, but I’m gone. Other times I put the radio on low, a murmur, but sometimes I catch a headline and have to listen…. So many reasons for NOT sleeping, and yet HE can just sleep, like that, so annoying! ❤️

Sleep help

Posted on October 1, 2022October 1, 2022 Posted in UncategorizedTagged 'the', Complicated, Dream, Helpful, Quiet, Sleep, Sleeping, Thinking, Tired1 Comment

Your mind is muddled, thoughts roll over and through your mind. Repeating over and over the things that went wrong in the day. Things pop into your mind from years ago. This is never ending, you start watching your alarm clock as minutes or hours tick by….

Then you remember, someone told you think of the word ‘THE’ nothing else, just ‘the’… Think of it slowly, over and over again…

Why? I think it’s because the word ‘the’ has no connotations, nothing to cling onto, while you are thinking ‘the’ you can’t think of anything else. It helps block roiling thoughts, and you just drift off to sleep. Honestly, over the last two months it has really helped. I don’t even remember drifting off, but then I sleep quite well….

Mallaband-Brown

Tag: Tired