Gone

A few nights ago my cat came in limping. It was about 11pm but I decided not to wait but to take him to the emergency vets. I rang a kind friend who would take us to the vets. When he arrived I got the cat carrier out. Unfortunately my cat recently had an operation and as soon as he saw the carrier he made for the back door.. I tried to stop him but didn’t dare grab him incase I made his injury worse. I opened up the door to see him dissappear into the garden undergrowth.

Unfortunately I could not follow because of my poor balance and coordination.

Since that night I have called and whistled for him almost every hour. But he’s not come back. My friend has looked all round the garden twice, but my cat has always been good at hiding.

Now I think he’s gone to sleep somewhere dark and quiet, I’ve reported him missing, but there is no sign. He was having medicine every night for his heart so that will no longer be protecting him.. After the loss of my other boy cat a few months ago I cannot explain how sad I am and guilty that I let him get away. My only excuse was his fear of the cat carrier. I don’t know what to do except grieve. I have my little girl cat. But she is very independent and quite aloof.

Farewell

Farewell Woody cat
A huge chunk of my life has just passed over the rainbow bridge and it’s such a shock. He’s been quiet and sleepy for a few days so I took him to the vets. Unfortunately he was diagnosed with end stage kidney failure and they couldn’t do anything for him.
I’m in bits. He was a quirky cat who slept on the middle steps of the stairs and endangered me every time I tried to get past him. He was a big soft giant of a cat and would put his paw out when he was lying down to say hi. I will miss him very much.

Shout

I was shouted at by a youth in a hoodie on a bike tonight as I walked home with my shopping. He shouted “bitch” at me so I said “piss off” which is a mild swearword here in the UK. He heard me because he shouted the same word again and I responded “piss off” again!

He disappeared but he must have gone round a mini roundabout because then he cycled back past me and up onto the pavement in front of me. I didn’t want a confrontation so I crossed the road and walked into another supermarket. I asked a manager in the shop if I could wait a few minutes because the shock of what might have happened got to me! I finally walked home after talking to a friend on the phone (I’d tried ringing the non emergency Police number but couldn’t get through). Then I checked the lad wasn’t about? What is wrong with lads/men these days?

When I got home I posted on social media and it turned out another woman had been frightened by him. He cycled up behind her and screamed in her ear!

I’m going out earlier in future to avoid him.

Blurry photo

It would have been our anniversary today. We lived together for years before we married. I painted him when I was about 20 and he still sits in this painting looking out at me. I did a lot of drawings and portraits of him over the years, I am glad there are visible memories of him.

What will happen when I go? Who knows what my relatives will want to do with all my art? Will a local museum take them, or will they just get skipped? I don’t know, I won’t be here but I would like to have some recognition. The trouble is I’m very eclectic, I paint for my self in these images. Ah well, more questions…

Thinking again.

I’m better off than the majority of the people in the world. I have food and water and shelter and reasonable health. I don’t live in a war zone. But I’m worried about the world, so much horror and anxiety. Will things ever get better or must we all be stuck in a morass of hate filled argument and anger? Something might give, but all I can see is more of the same. I am not generally a pessimist and it may be my feelings are simply a reflection of what’s going on in my own life. However I can wish for better times, even if its unlikely to happen in the near future. I think we are in the Pandoras box situation? We still have hope.

Cat situation

My Cat is not well. He has heart failure. He’s on medication but is off his food. Just got to look after him. He’s lost weight, not in any pain. He sat on my chest for an hour this afternoon, purring, nuzzling my hand, but I can see he’s deteriorating. I think I might have to take him back to the vets tomorrow.

I’ve had him for 8 years as a rescue cat, so I don’t know his actual age. He’s so loving. I will miss him deeply when he goes.

Getting old

My old boy cat is getting thin. He is on medication for his heart, but that seems to be making him thinner. I don’t know his actual age because he was a rescue cat about 8 years ago. I didn’t find out his age then but he was fully grown. I’m having to accept he won’t be around for much longer. I’m giving him him lots of treats. He’s getting small meals but as often as he wants. I can’t make him eat but I can try and tempt him. At least he can sit in the sun if he wants.