Talking to people?

I love painting but I find it hard to sell. My mind sometimes goes into panic mode and I say strange things instead of pleasantries. I can hear my voice coming out with odd comments, about someone’s walking stick, or immesaying I will discount the price of a print when they have barely looked at it. Today was odd and difficult. It’s been a long time since I have had to talk to people about my art. I was not fluent with my thoughts. I was nervous, sometimes tounge tied. As the number of people increased it got worse. My throat got dry. I wanted to talk but I just stayed silent. It was better towards the end, but I’m an artist not a saleswoman. Anxiety and covid make it harder.

Masked

I was just stopped in the street by a woman who said ‘you know there’s no one around?’ I looked about me and said ‘yes I can see that’. Then she said ‘so you don’t need a mask’ I looked at her. Why tell me this when I had just forgotten to take it off, but why did it matter to her? Then she said ‘it might make it difficult for you to breathe with carbon Dioxide building up behind it.’

Oh I really wanted to say something, like ‘oh dear, so many people collapsing after wearing a mask for more than five minutes!’ or ‘ they are permiable to air, they just stop viruses’. But I bit my lip under my mask and said ‘no I’m OK. I’m used to wearing a mask at night, I have sleep aponea’. ‘Oh that OK then’ she said. I said ‘goodnight’ and walked off. But then called back ‘I’m still cautious about covid’. Perhaps people belive it’s over? But it’s my choice to wear a mask.

Too many people

I was shocked at my reaction to visiting the Thai temple at King’s Bromley today. There were so many people. It was a friendly atmosphere but I felt overwhelmed. I went into the crowded area in front of the stage (wearing a mask), but almost immediately I had to get away. I burst into tears! I went and sat in the shade of a tree away from the main crowd. I didn’t like being exposed to do many people. I was also surprised that only one other people were wearing masks. I’m supposed to be visiting somewhere else tomorrow but I’m seriously concerned about how I will cope, fear, nerves and anxiety again ?

Moss on our car

I haven’t bothered to wash the car for months. I hardly drive it unless we are going for a walk round Westport Lake and that’s only a few miles. Why?

Covid, keeping away from people.

Fuel costs, I’ve only filled it up about six times in a year.

Walking to the shops. I’m slow and shaky but the car is not needed.

My shaking arm, its uncomfortable to drive.

So I was deciding whether to wash it, but I found this little mound of moss. I think I will let it be. Let nature take its course. After all I can always get a bucket of water on it. Its old and hard to get parts, but it’s a good car.

No lateral flow tests

If you live in England you can no longer get free lateral flow tests, this despite covid 19 infections being very high (about one in thirteen). I think it’s stupid, we are supposed to ‘live with it’ (die with it?) and yet Wales, Scotland and Northern Ireland are not ending it yet. Why do our government think this is OK. I think it’s to save money. You now have to pay. All the people on low incomes with higher bills to pay won’t be able to afford them. People are going into work with covid. It is spreading. This is stupid.

Can you be semi agoraphobic?

Anxious, the world worries me. People are going out again because our government has raised all restrictions. But the office of national statistics has found that Covid cases are going up again in Britain with 1 in 20 people who would have tested positive last week (if people were still taking tests). That figure has increased from the previous week and the Omicron strain had mutated to a more transmissible version. Elderly people who had their booster shots first are catching it. Hospitalisation has gone up. Our flipping government is blasé, ridiculous, uncaring. But so what? We’ve got to learn to live with it.. For live read die. Is it any wonder I want to keep away from people?

Keep your mask on!

Our marvellous, incredible, smart government raised all restrictions on Covid 19 a couple of weeks ago. No masks, no social distancing, wonderful?! NOT!

Now Covid numbers that were going down are going up again. What do you mean? you say. Yes numbers are now between 1 in 13 and 1 in 30 depending on where you live in the UK.

Hospitals are taking in more patients although they are not all ending up in intensive care. Our government seems to think we ‘have to live with it’ more like ‘have to die with it’. I wish our government had a few brains instead of bean counters!

Farewell

This was our local police station, now its being knocked down! What a waste of resources. No doubt they will build a block of apartments. Our city used to have about seven police stations including a headquarters. Police could get to crime scenes or incidents quickly. Now they are miles away. A few years ago the government removed twenty thousand police jobs. Suddenly they decided they wanted to recruit twenty thousand again. Where do they go? What a strange situation. Its a bit like getting rid of all restrictions for Covid which the government are currently doing. Will they, after a few months, have to bring them back again. I wonder how much money they are wasting and how many lives they might devastate by removing the police and relaxing the rules?

Bug

My hubby has caught my cold bug (not Covid) now he feels like I have been feeling all week. He’s been sneezing a lot and apart from coming downstairs for food etc he’s spent the day in bed reading books. I hope he throws it off quickly. He doesn’t usually get ill but because we have been dodging viruses for the last two years I guess our immunity to the common cold has diminished.

Meanwhile I’ve had messages on other social media blaming masks for Covid! I replied that I guessed I’d never agree with the person and pointed out that before the pandemic surgeons, doctors, nurses and dentists wore normal surgical masks. If they don’t stop viruses or bacteria why wear them. Plus the person said CO2 would build up and Oxygen can’t get through a mask! I think O2 is a smaller molecule than CO2 so it’s More likely to get through (and FAR SMALLER than a virus particle). But logic and science does not seem to satisfy these people.