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I feel like I’m waiting
Watching out
For something to happen
A buzzing, fizzing, aching
Feeling unable to settle
Like the house will fall down
Or a comet will hit
Fires will strike
Things will crash
So I sit
Nerves twisting my gut
Agony and anxiety
Catastrophising
Waiting for my jenga life
To fall..
Procrastinating
Just like that my heads banging
No warning
Thudding
Long time since I had one.
Tired neck
Aching eyes
Need sleep
Need food
Symptoms of fatigue
Let me know when
I can sleep
Deep
And painless and quiet.
I can read
Read my thoughts
Thoughts joined together
Together in words
Words made of letters
Letters linked with lines
Lines make it cursive
Cursive makes it MINE!
Time ticks for all
Fast or slow, time passes.
Tempus fugit when you’re having fun
Unwind in the morning and relax
The world is turning slightly faster every day
Circadian rhythms control moods
Tired and sleepy night time beckons
Time loses us sometimes…
Infinity pools together..
Recently….
Someone explain… First my car broke, now the water supply to the bathroom is bust. I had a flood on Sunday. And my fridge is freezing things, my microwave is on the way out, my hoover stopped working, and today my oil heater conked! Plus I had to sort out my phone… And the fence blew over..
I said I don’t mind having bad luck.. But this is ridiculous! Things must get better soon..
Ugh!
One less hours sleep
Clocks sprang forward
Insomnia splurged
Sleep deprived
It says 23:20
But it’s really 00:20
Am tired
Lost
Shattered
Achy
Huh! I remember
Extra light…
I was talking to a friend I haven’t seen for ages and started telling her my recent history and illnesses. She asked how I coped and I said “well someone’s got to have these things, if I do then I’m taking on something so someone else doesn’t have to”. And I realised that’s exactly how I feel!
I don’t feel crushed or annoyed. I don’t feel too hard done by. I just think “OK, so let me just deal with it”, take the medication. So what if I rattle as long as I can keep going.
Don’t get me wrong, I am really fed up at the moment. The world is flummoxing me. It’s crazy, and selfish, and cruel. We can’t escape the creators of the chaos. But I will accept my life for now.
I put a random word in the photo search here “warch” and this came up.. What is it? Some form of lights?
Random thoughts are… A train level crossing warning light? Basically because of the cross behind the lights… But where does “warch” come in….
I was actually looking for Watch, but misspelt it so I just decided to make this a bit of an odd post. I can’t think of something to write about, the world is not a good place at the moment. Sorry to be boring, just losing the plot slightly.
akespeare’s tragicomedy The Winter’s Tale
the character Antigonus meets his demise.
mous and mysterious stage directions, desc
nile abandoning a baby in a desolate place.
……. .
I wrote the words the right way up to make it easier for you. I think I first decided to learn to read upside down at school. I was in class and wanted to read what my teacher had written about me… I was around 9 or 10 and I guess, nosy!
Is this something anyone else has done? I also used to write my name forwards with my right hand and backwards at the same time with my left, mirroring the right hand script.
I also learned the Greek alphabet from my dictionary on one occasion. It was just something interesting to do…
It’s funny how memories suddenly wake up in your mind, I don’t know why this stuck…..
I fancy fish fingers and chips for tea. After a week of being ill I’m ready to start eating properly again. The problem is my fridge and freezer are almost empty. I haven’t been well enough to wash or clean up for days and I’ve done no shopping. If I don’t cook tonight I will be so hungry.
Then I thought, this is a first world problem. I can go shopping tomorrow, I can eat a bowl of soup and I have bread. I could just make toast or make some porridge. Or I could send out for a pizza or something else.
I don’t live in a war zone. I’m not being bombarded with drones or missiles. I am not being threatened by violence. My human rights are not being violated. I don’t live in a dictatorship.
So
Moaning about being hungry is NOT something I should do. I should try and help others instead of complaining.
Hugs.
Mallaband-Brown