Stuck

Do you ever just get stuck in your thoughts. Lost and not quite sure what to do or where to go. Marathon prevarication. Held back by thinking too much. And heat doesn’t help. You wait in hope that it might cool down. Your mind isn’t working, it’s fused in place, clunking, square thoughts jammed in a round hole. You just want to break out of it. Find a way through. Maybe in a while I will feel more like myself.

Dover today

If you are going to Kent or Dover at the moment? Don’t! Lorries and trucks are stuck there because a new variant of Covid19 have been found in the South East of the country. Because of this the border with many countries have been closed. Trucks are not able to get home and so there are queues of them on the M20 and they are being parked up on old airport in Kent. They are parked I but with poor facilities, not many toilets and no food or water!

The worry is that even when the border is reopened there will be further problems as Brexitis about to happen at the end of this month. That means there may me further pfoblems and delays. I do wonder about the mentality of the English and often despair!

Cat got out!

Loud rattling at the cat flap! Something trying to get in…. I went to open the door, but there was just darkness. I went back to preparing out evening meal. Then. More rattling. I went to the door and opened it, our boy cat was outside in the dark, trying to get back in. He dashed into the kitchen and proceeded to give me the biggest headbump ever. Just pleased to see me.

Talking to hubby, we decided he must have sneaked out when hubby went out to put some food in the shed for the hedgehogs.

Keyboard problems

I got my computer back today from the repair shop. The computer was fixed and they could find no real problems. We put it down to a bad extension cable that was now dead. Great. It took me ages to plug all the wires in. Screen, yes, video camera, yes, speakers, yes. My mouse was working, but no Internet? Oh, forgot to plug it in. Now I could check my emails. But when I came to typing my responses? No joy. No letters! No words! No number lock or caps lock. I tried all the different USB ports. Nothing. I tried updating Windows, nothing. I tried re-booting, nothing!

Grr! Just a message each time I tried to type.  Something along the line of your USB connection failed the last time this device was connected. Windows does not accept it….. No! This was after the computer shop had closed! NO!

What’s in a cage?

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What’s in a cage,

and what is a cage?

Are we trapped in a net,

or free?

Are we birds in cages

or enclosed by space?

How big is your cage?

Can you walk across a room?

Are their bars on your window?

Is there no way out.

No bus,

no car?

Are you stuck in your mind?

Many cages exist,

some are visible,

some are in your mind…

 

Prevarication

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Why can’t I get things done?

I think and think,

Decide, then change my mind.

I wait till the time seems right,

Then miss acting on it.

Why? because I spend time thinking.

Then I think again…….

Too much to do, too little time?

But if I just started early…

Wasn’t so desperate to be perfect.

Took less thought and acted sooner.

Maybe then I could

Get

Things

Done!

But now…

I’m not lazy, not crazy, just hazy…

Stuck!

Painting

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Sometimes my creative juices freeze

then like a bird I flit and flitter

from one path to another

sit and shiver.

Like a lonely lark.

Sometimes they thaw

but not enough

so the thought is there

but cannot reach from my brain

through my heart

to my hands.. ..

In other times my mind is woken,

colours flow

shapes fly from my fingers

hot sharp ideas stagger me with their invention.

Later, all is quiet again.

The mood has stormed its way through me.

Calm descends and I am lost in fog again.