There’s people I need to speak to, but as the days go on I get less likely to reach out. Its like I’m encapsulating myself against the whole world. Retreating into myself, hiding away? So nothing else can hurt me. Keeping busy where I have to, but really all I want is to put my head under the covers and escape from the world. Self protection, I hope it’s not selfishness. I don’t know if I will feel better soon. Am I being lazy? No, definitely not. Just torn apart.
Today I put childrens book together in a site called Blurb. I had saved all my files as .tif files and it needed them as .Jpegs so I spent HOURS swapping them. A lot of the jpeg files were not able to open. It meant that I had to change some of the pictures for different ones. I’ve ordered a one off copy for my course. The only problem is that it might arrive late so I’m going to have to take the photos to a printer and mock up the book as well.
I’m sorry to say I’m not well. I seem to be getting one thing after another wrong with me. My back and neck are aching. I’m worried I might have shingles but trying to get in the doctors is proving impossible. Everything is so busy, the NHS is getting overwhelmed and so many people are struggling to get treatment. So I’m drinking plenty of fluids and taking pain killers. I’m truly fed up. I have things I need to do and this means I have to keep putting them off.