Sleepless in Stoke

My minds a whirl..

Little thoughts track big ones

Trickle through my brain

Like sand in a puzzle

Clogging up the workings

No smooth calmness

Jumping clumps of

Dark matter

Or spaghetti goo

What does that meant

To you?

Nothing, random

Overactive

Spiced with tinges

Of pain

Let me sleep

Not that tune

Again!

Snake/Dragon

I tried drawing a sort of Mediaeval image of how I imagined a dragon would look in an old book or manuscript. This was more to try and evoke the style than to copy a real drawing. I tried to think how I would draw a dragon if I was a monk adding illustrations or illuminations to an old bible or bestiary. I should probably have looked at images of George and the Dragon. But I wanted to draw a sinuous curve. I could also have mirrored the image so it would look like the letter S… I might try that. Anyway I’m not well so drawing is occupying my mind and distracting me. X

Mind/brain

A sleepless night and suddenly I had a brainwave for this one! It’s fragile, full of fuzzing thoughts and it can’t settle down. Collage with offcuts, parcel tape, nail varnish, black ink and felt pens. Sundays prompt was brain/mind for #bandofsketchers

I really don’t know what was going on. The inspiration? A little plastic bag with pink zigzag stripes and a book on human biology I got when I was at school!

Getting things done…

At last!

For a few months I’ve been putting things off. I used to sort things out regularly and efficiently in my old job, but when I left things changed.

I was always at the beck and call of people, sorting out their problems. My mind would work through possibilities and come up with solutions.

When I finished work I tried to get elected as a Councillor. I still wanted to help people and saw it as a way of using my skills. But the electors chose someone else. My political party had lost support. Then I regrouped and started a college course.

But as the months have gone on I have felt more and more overwhelmed. Putting things off to the end of semesters. Leaving the paperwork sitting on my desk. Why? Prevarication…. I wasn’t trusting myself to get things right. A couple of things had gone wrong and I was scared to try again. Would I succeed? Could I cope? Health issues for both me and hubby have increased my stress levels..

Anyway, today I did half the things on my list (about four of them) I’ve got more to do but I feel better about it.

Fingers crossed I can do more tomorrow.

Shall I delete some posts?

I write about so many things.

Pour out words on the page.

My mind is full of thoughts

Too many to control

They fly out of my eyes,

My ears.

Where to stop?

Someone suggested deleting posts..

Should I remove them?

Cut back, reduce them?

Take the time to edit.

Or just leave them.

Enough or too much?

I will give it thought.

starting…

Where to start a story? From experience? Imagination, or a bit of both?

This was my first panel in a 9-panel illustration. You may have seen it on another blog page. Where could this go? My idea was about the problem of hoarding in the present day, consumerism, the need to have objects to comfort you. But maybe it could have gone a different route. Perhaps she visits an antiques fair and finds an undiscovered painting or a jewel that has been thought of as trash. Maybe she goes to a secondhand shop and discovers a first edition book by H Ryder Haggard. Or adds some new kittens to her family.

Is she alone, does her collection cause a conflict with relatives. Has she got enough money to feed her collecting hobby? Where does she fit all of her belongings? She might have a lock up garage that is broken into causing despair when her family heirlooms go missing. Perhaps she meets a like minded collector or the Police investigate her for keeping stolen goods?

Maybe, even, it could be a murder mystery, a jeweled dagger is amongst the effects she receives following the death of a maiden aunt from Glastonbury? Why Glastonbury? Because I’ve always wanted to visit it!

Panic mode!

I am doing a college course in illustration and as far as I’m aware we are supposed to be doing working drawings, just drafts, so I’ve done a lot of doodles and drawings, trying ideas and layouts. But when I looked at what my fellow students have done everything looks fully worked up. I’m questioning whether I have missed the brief? I can only do what they ask. Quite worried now.

Stuck

Do you ever just get stuck in your thoughts. Lost and not quite sure what to do or where to go. Marathon prevarication. Held back by thinking too much. And heat doesn’t help. You wait in hope that it might cool down. Your mind isn’t working, it’s fused in place, clunking, square thoughts jammed in a round hole. You just want to break out of it. Find a way through. Maybe in a while I will feel more like myself.