New paintings and regular art updates.
Today, after years I finally wrote down a lot of the bad things that have happened to me over the years. I’ve held it deep down and rarely shared it because, stiff upper lip, you just get on with it. People call me stoic, well I have been like this for over 60 years. I’m only saying now because I need to prove it to someone. Taken all day to write it all down. Do I feel better? Don’t know. I think I’ve still got some hope left.
I’ve got the proportions wrong, but it was hard to see through my tears as I painted him. Symbol of deep and lasting friendship. I know he won’t be back. One last sleep, nested somewhere in the garden. His heart strings jerked out of tune and failing. No medication for days, no chance of surviving. My greif is astounding.
You were in that play
Playing on the monitor
From ten years ago
Still strong
Still vigorous
You portrayed a viking
From olden times
You gave your all
And tears drenched my face
How to go on
Without your embrace?
I think I’m holding this phone too much.
Strong grip tightens muscles,
Hand clutches
Top and side of my shoulder aches.
Limited movement
Tense and tight
Shoulders raised to my ears
It’s agony when I lie down to sleep
Or reach up to get something
Out of the cupboard.
Grr
Enough
Rest and recuperate.
Everything aches
From head to foot
From face to hips
And shaking limbs
Are causing pain.
An ache that grows
And makes me frown.
I must relax
And need to rest
To give me health
Again, at last…
I woke up aching,
My shoulder hurt
My neck is tight
Need to relax
Only 4 hours
Of sleepless
Discomfort.
Decaff helped
Pain killers too.
Now dozing
Tired
Might nap
I need a hug
Ugh!
Lurgy, ill, sore throat
3 weeks 4 weeks more
The knives are out
My body aches
I’m sad and tired.
Give me a rest
Give me some time
To recover from it
Let me breathe
Stop this pain.
Scenario: you sit down and a cat comes up and settles on your knee. One of the other cats comes up to say hello, reaches up and puts her claws in your leg in greeting, you disentangle her claws and the cat on your knee jumps off. Do you A, put up with it and try and get the comfy cat back, B, shout Stop! Loudly at the second cat? Or C, buy kevlar shin pads to avoid puncture wounds?
Modern life
I need to change
My name
But no matter
How often I phone
They can’t do it!
Two type authenticity
Pain in the proverbials
Change a password
What’s wrong with 987654321?
No you have used that before
DDrF457gTi. XS92?
How do I remember that?
So I leave the name
The same
Insane.
Where did you go?
I have invisible memories of you
I notice at night
It’s as if you are next to me
Silently I listen for you
But only hear the cat, snoring quietly
I do feel watched over
After more than 40 years
Gone in an instant
I would love to have you back
If it would mend my broken heart.
Mallaband-Brown