Esther Chiltons weekly prompt

Beauty

Esther asked us to write about beauty this week. I struggled to explain what I think of the word. I wrote :

Beauty can be on the inside, you don’t have to look amazing to be alive and well thought of. If people could read your thoughts? How would they interpret them. Odd or plain, ugly or old? It’s your brain and thought processes are important. Consider the world around you and how people are perceived. Media makes things worse.

But then I thought am I talking about personal, intellectual beauty? In the case of the word should I just look at beauty as form? Like a lovely rose? As how I feel about a wonderful day or a landscape? There are so many connotations to the word.

Migraine

Had a ‘retinal migraine’ last night, an unnerving experience. I was reading subtitles on TV when they started to go blurry, then the edge of my vision started to sparkle and look jagged, hard to explain, so I’ve tried to draw it. Apparently according to my optician it’s not unusual, I should have covered one eye then the other. If it happens in both it’s an effect in my brain. It cleared up after 20 mins. (if just in one eye, then it may be a problem in one of my eyes).

Remembering songs

Something in my brain ‘dings’

I remember how the song ‘sings’

Music has a way of sticking

Notes together, metronome ticking.

Sound comes back as mouth opens

Words come out, with the vocals

Songs from months or years ago

We remember how they go!

From some dark corner of my mind..

My vocal chords my brain reminds

The timing, tempo, notes and all..

Into a pattern they all fall

My joy as memory keeps going

And music, memories it keeps sowing…

Nursery Rhymes

I think seeing the white rabbit picture this week pushed some memories forward from the back of my mind…

Some of them I haven’t recalled since my childhood, and I don’t know if anyone else remembers them. I can remember two fully…

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water,

Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after.

Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper.

He went to bed, to mend his head with vinegar and brown paper!

And…

See-saw Marjorie Daw

Jenny will have a new master

She shall earn but a penny a day

Because she can’t work any faster!

These are memories from the 1960’s. Boy I feel old. I wish I could fully remember Oranges and Lemons, said the bells of St Clements. Or George Porgie, pudding and pie…

It’s funny what you have contained in that greyish pink blancmange called your brain. It can hold information that has slurped about inside it for decades. Like I think I know the triumvirate in the Russian revolution was Kaminev, Zinoviev and Trotsky (I learnt it for history and it stuck).

Memory is strange and sometimes randow. But as they say, we are our memories, and our experiences teach us how to manage life.

Flitting

My mind flits

From one thought to another

Over the same land

At different stages of coherence.

Dreams of silky seas

That were not mine

Or high mountain peaks

All is enfolded within.

Pictures taken by others

Hidden folds and valleys

Corrugations of brain.

Dream travel can be overwhelming

Or limited to a single room

Hidden meaning or memory.

Then the cotton thread snaps

And you wake,

To grey darkness

Stuck back in reality

Only a thin film away

But so far

From dream country.

Shaking

I want to know what is happening with my brain and nerves. I am still struggling with a shaking left arm and hand, and cramps in my left leg and foot. I think it’s a trapped nerve, but it doesn’t seem to be getting any better. I’m hoping when I finally get to see a doctor I will get a good result and hopefully it can be fixed. Meanwhile I’m thankful it’s on my left side as I’m right handed. It makes some things more difficult and it’s tiring and frustrating. I know I’ve moaned about this before, but it’s getting to me. I wrote this yesterday but then forgot to publish it. And I’m getting forgetful with some words, but I’m hoping thats just stress! I went for an eye appointment set for the 29th, except it’s in June, not May! No wonder they were not open….Help

Mind/brain

A sleepless night and suddenly I had a brainwave for this one! It’s fragile, full of fuzzing thoughts and it can’t settle down. Collage with offcuts, parcel tape, nail varnish, black ink and felt pens. Sundays prompt was brain/mind for #bandofsketchers

I really don’t know what was going on. The inspiration? A little plastic bag with pink zigzag stripes and a book on human biology I got when I was at school!

Busy

I’m striving to finish my college essay. I’m two thirds of the way through and fighting with the ideas of semiotics, signs and signifies, interpretants, other words that fly over my head! I’m trying to tie it all together into a coherent whole. My brain hurts but I have till Thursday to finish it. So if I’m not around… Well you will know why!

Looking out

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Painting from a few years ago. It’s one that I did about imagination and the mind. I don’t know where it went. It may have been sold. The foreground is meant to represent axons and synapses in the brain. Thought happens, but how do you describe it? How you depict it? The eyes are supposed to be the window to the mind.

And how do we know the mind is in charge. Only a few centuries ago, the heart was seen as the centre of emotions. Hence the phrases like “letting your heart rule your head”.

I’ve done similar pictures in watercolour pencils, but they are probably in a sketchbook somewhere. I’ve got too much stuff.

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