Mourning and bereavement

Posted on September 20, 2022 Posted in UncategorizedTagged bereavement, coping, feeling, Healing, Learning, Sad, Sleep, Talking, Time, Tired, Upset4 Comments

When you lose someone it is complex and confusing. Especially when it is a sudden event. First there is disbelief, and that keeps flooding back. I keep wanting to talk to the person who is gone. Then I swear at them! Angry with them. Asking why did it happen? It’s unbelievable and shattering. Everything is on hold, I can’t decide what to do for the best. I’ve talked to lots of people, shared some of my feelings. I hope that’s the right thing to do. Life seems bad at the moment but at least I’m still trying to cope. Sleep is another problem. If you see me here late at night I might just be trying to take my mind off things.

Capital

Posted on September 20, 2022 Posted in Sketching, UncategorizedTagged Art, capital, capital letters, Colours, Contours, Drawing, Life, Pattern, SketchingLeave a comment

#bandofsketchers prompt on Sunday Capital. But it was not a good day, and I don’t think the next days will be good either. But I decided to draw capital letters instead of choosing London or New York or something similar. I just wanted to use art to take my mind off things. X

Halved

Posted on September 19, 2022September 19, 2022 Posted in UncategorizedTagged Death, Earth, Gone, Life, Memories, Missing, Moon, Poem, Poetry, Sadness, Sun, Thoughts, Time, WordsLeave a comment

My sun has gone out

The moon has split in half

My world is darkened

The loss of a relative

Guts your soul

Don’t scream

Don’t cry

Hold it together

For you

For everyone else

But it’s hard to take.

Good morning cat

Posted on September 19, 2022 Posted in Cat, UncategorizedTagged Black and white cat, Calm, Cat, Friendly, Help, Love, slow blink, Tuxedo catLeave a comment

The cat greeted me this morning. Sitting on the windowledge, stating at me and purring. I knew what she wanted, breakfast. There is just enough space for her to sit next to the glass paperweights I’ve collected over the years. The cats calm me down. They cheer me up. They help me when I feel down. They look for love and give it back in return. Although they are not like dogs, because their love is not unconditional! They tend to want food and can be quite demanding. But when a cat slowly closes its eyes at you in what they call a ‘slow blink’ you know they are sharing their feelings with you.

Sorrow

Posted on September 19, 2022September 19, 2022 Posted in Sketching, UncategorizedTagged Broken, creative urge, Digitally manipulated photo, expression, Sad, Sorrow, Thoughts, tornLeave a comment

I won’t show my face fully because I feel like every part of me is breaking up into tiny pieces of nothing. I am numb. I want to talk, but I want to stay silent. But the creative urge pushes me to make an image of how I’m feeling, inside as well as out. They say time heals. I hope it can glue my soul back together, or a stich in time will darn my minds pieces into a whole again. I am torn into atoms and scattered.

Time ticks by

Posted on September 18, 2022 Posted in UncategorizedTagged Gone, Goodbye, Grief, Loss, Lost, Poem, Poetry, Remembered, Sadness1 Comment

Time ticks by

Your journey has ended

The world has whirled on in space

And left you behind.

An abrupt ending

Hopefully peacefully

You won’t see my tears

My pain, my loss

I won’t hear your voice again.

Lost in the wilderness

Grief tunnels in

Tugs at my heart

Rending and tearing.

How can I say goodbye

When it’s too late?

Regrets

Posted on September 18, 2022 Posted in UncategorizedTagged Gone, Goodbye, Memories, Regrets, Sadness, Shock, sudden, Thinking, working it out1 Comment

The world is mixed up today. Something happened and I think it’s too personal and painful to recount here, so I’m not mentioning names, but I am writing to sort my thoughts out a little.

I have so many regrets, things I didn’t do, words I didn’t speak. Silence I didn’t break. Not because I was being mean, but because I lost track of time, I forgot to remember to keep in touch. And now I can’t speak, I can’t phone. Your voice has gone. Lost. Not forgotten, but hard to remember.

Years go by, we were not close, but we understood each other. Now there is nothing. I have consolation, hubby, family and friends, but I’m so sad. Goodbye. That’s all I can think.

Sad news

Posted on September 18, 2022 Posted in UncategorizedTagged Life, Memory, Sadness2 Comments

Something has happened, I am not saying what. But I don’t think I will be on line for a few days. I have a lot to think about and possibly organise. X

The Queue for the Queen

Posted on September 17, 2022 Posted in Sketching, UncategorizedTagged Black ink fine line pen, Death, Drawing, funeral, Life, public, Queen, Queue, Sadness, Sketching, Sorrow, state funeralLeave a comment

The Queen is lying in state in Westminster Hall with Guards at each corner of the dias where her coffin sits draped in the Royal standard. She has been there since Thursday and the public are filing past in solemn mourning. A queue up to five miles long as been moving slowly through London while people wait to view the Monarch. The start of the queue was suspended for a while as there were too many people joining it. At one stage they were saying it would take twenty two hours to reach Westminster Hall. It is continuing to move night and day, and will run until the last people are allowed to view the lying in state at six thirty am on Monday 19th September. After that the queue will be closed and will have to disperse because the State Funeral will take place. Such a sad and solemn occasion.

Temperature

Posted on September 17, 2022 Posted in UncategorizedTagged Autumn, Blank verse, Electricity, Environment, Gas, Keeping warm, Light, Poem, Poetry, saving, Thinking, Time, WinterLeave a comment

Here’s a bit of blank verse,

We are lucky not to be too cold.

It’s nineteen point two

A slight chill in here

Two small lights on

Saving energy?

So I have a dressing gown

Or a cardigan

To wear.

I will buy a hot water bottle.

No gas fire this autumn or winter

Central Heating?

When it’s too cold.

An electric heater otherwise.

Gas costs more than electricity here

I can’t afford double what we paid

Last year.

Well at least I’m not heating up

The environment, too much.