New paintings and regular art updates.
Interactive, haptic
Hectic, internetted
Encapsulated, held
Bells and whistles
Too connected!
Now my projects done
I’m having fun
But it’s to seductive
All those screens
You and him and me
Chatting and liking
Dose of dopamine
Eyes go funny
Arm aches
Fingers droop
But still I type.
Put the phone down
Disconnect…..
Freedom!
Sometimes you just have to rest
Even though you try your best
To do the things
You need to do
Too tired to rhyme
So I’ll have some time
To myself today
Not work, not play
Just relax
And rest
For half an hour!
And close my eyes
And sleep
I love painting but I find it hard to sell. My mind sometimes goes into panic mode and I say strange things instead of pleasantries. I can hear my voice coming out with odd comments, about someone’s walking stick, or immesaying I will discount the price of a print when they have barely looked at it. Today was odd and difficult. It’s been a long time since I have had to talk to people about my art. I was not fluent with my thoughts. I was nervous, sometimes tounge tied. As the number of people increased it got worse. My throat got dry. I wanted to talk but I just stayed silent. It was better towards the end, but I’m an artist not a saleswoman. Anxiety and covid make it harder.
Kaleidoscope or Mandala using a sketch app on my phone, I think as I draw I try and create an interesting and satisfying pattern. You don’t know what you will end up with when you start, but I think it does help relax you. The app allows you to draw symmetrical patterns by repeating one line over and over again round a circle. I love playing with apps.
Eye don’t know
Is it me?
Colours coruscate
Light flickers
Only one eye
Staring back at me?
Knowing nothing
Losing thoughts
I don’t know if it’s me.
Maybe?
I was just stopped in the street by a woman who said ‘you know there’s no one around?’ I looked about me and said ‘yes I can see that’. Then she said ‘so you don’t need a mask’ I looked at her. Why tell me this when I had just forgotten to take it off, but why did it matter to her? Then she said ‘it might make it difficult for you to breathe with carbon Dioxide building up behind it.’
Oh I really wanted to say something, like ‘oh dear, so many people collapsing after wearing a mask for more than five minutes!’ or ‘ they are permiable to air, they just stop viruses’. But I bit my lip under my mask and said ‘no I’m OK. I’m used to wearing a mask at night, I have sleep aponea’. ‘Oh that OK then’ she said. I said ‘goodnight’ and walked off. But then called back ‘I’m still cautious about covid’. Perhaps people belive it’s over? But it’s my choice to wear a mask.
Wrapped up in my magic phone I can ignore the world. The problems I have, the worries my friends have.
Wrapped up in my magic phone I can focus on the trivial things, the bits that make me smile.
Wrapped up in my magic phone I can watch daft dogs, silly things. Lost kittens in mittens.
Wrapped up in my magic phone I can forget people. Lose the worries, the wars, the poverty.
Wrapped up in my magic phone I am in cotton wool. Insulated nicely against the world.
I must turn it off and put it down. Lose it or let the battery go flat to be free. Maybe? But just another glance can’t hurt…..
We think the Earth goes round the Sun and the Moon goes round the Earth. So at the end of a year the Earth is in the same place as a year ago. Right? Wrong! The Galaxy is spinning and the Sun moves with it through space. The Earth orbits the Sun but because the Sun is moving the Earth spirals along around it, and the Moon curves and spirals round Earth. So hard to try and draw! If we could time travel we would have to move through time and space to get back onto the Earth. But if you take into account the speed we are travelling and the distance we will have travelled around the Galaxy, I imagine it would take a great deal of energy to do it!
Ink bleeds through paper. Draw around those patches, lines and dots, and you get a patchwork ‘map’ that looks like roads and boulevards, streets and squares. A change of colour for city blocks. Villages line up on roads between fields. Some streets are tree lined, others are concrete. Does it show your age? Are you industrial or agrarian? Modern or ancient? Fortified? Or do you see veins, arteries and capillaries?
25.5.20, I drew our then outside cat outside the summerhouse where he used to sleep. Now the bushes have grown up and hubby has stored bikes in there. I’ve hardly been out this year. Too cold and wet, and it’s overgrown around it. We need to prune plants but my arm is not very strong and the muscles ache.
I don’t want the place to fall to rack and ruin. I must make more of an effort. I didn’t realise how much this pandemic could take out of you physically despite not catching the virus (hopefully never) I just wish things were better. Not just here, but everywhere. Goodness knows what atrocities are happening in Ukraine. Trucks are stuck on the motorway going to Dover while ferries are held up for health and safety deficiencies. Crops are rotting in fields, de to various problems including lack of workers because of Covid. Meanwhile our Prime minister and Chancellor have been fined for attending parties, when they had bought in laws to stop the public meeting up at parties – or stopping relatives visiting their loved ones who were dying of Covid. Many bad things, mad things, stupid things. I despair of people!
Mallaband-Brown