I am quite lost

My mind is a bit muddled at the moment. I am dealing with lots of ‘stuff’ and I feel overwhelming worry that I won’t get back on track. My life physically has been bothering me and I’m waiting for an appointment to try and find answers. I’m dealing with things for myself, my family and friends, and because I can put a good case for things I don’t mind helping. But when you persue various options and each one closes down it gets more and more frustrating. I wish I could herd cats, work out the best thing for us. I had to ask for help recently, and that was difficult. I’m a proud person and I don’t like to think I can’t cope. But you know those straws that broke the camels back? I think they are building up. Maybe I need to hibernate and look after myself, but turning away from others is not in my nature.

Smashed

Digital drawing

Playing again, filters, digital finger painting. I really like complicated patterns, but adding a filter of broken glass and a burst of light made it different. But I still see shapes that turn into things, in this case the blue squiggles remind me of someone playing a guitar? Or running? My mind is strange.

One tiny block of cheese!

My friend ordered some food on the Internet for home cooking. I saw what was in the box. There were various things:

Lots of herbs, chick peas, box of tomatoes, fresh tomatoes, sweet potato, garlic bulb, two carrots, baby carrots, two bags of potatoes, a shallot, two onions, green beans, a small pouch of honey, spices, an aubergine, an avocado, sumac?? And other stuff. Including bags of ice to keep two packets of minced meat and two chicken breasts cool.

There was also a tiny block of cheese, two inches by one inch by one inch, that made me chuckle…. Oh and a Partridge in a pear tree!

Flat tyre

I just went out to go to choir practice. I happened to look at one of the tyres and realised it looked odd. It was flat. It had gone down overnight. I think I will have to get it down to the garage to get it checked (I’ve not had it for long). I hope it’s something that can be fixed. I have some tyre weld but when you use that it can be very messy when you replace the tyre later. I hope it will be OK tomorrow.

Staring

The dragon stared, it looked out at me, the forest had hidden it until I got close. I didn’t know what to think? Where was it from? How had it got there? Was it real, mythical, mystical or magical.

I stood quietly. Waiting to see what happened. I didn’t have to wait long.

It spoke!

Who are you human? Why are you here? Its questions were the same as mine. Then it said, how can you see me? I am invisible!

Of course I replied that it was not. That I could see it perfectly. Then it said I must be young, or believe in stories. Grown ups rarely see dragons!

That’s how we became friends. A chance meeting. We had many adventures. I might tell them one day.

Making a Zine

Sixty four pages (32 images, 32 text) later. More glue and parcel tape than I can cope with. The parcel tape is white and has fragile written on it in big red letters.

I started by taping 32 a6 cards together with parcel tape, then gluing down an image and plain paper alternating with each other. My measurements were a bit off so some prints overlapped each other. The result works but is messy. I wrote on the blank sheets vaguely telling a story but it needs doing properly.

We will see what happens.

February dragons

Looking back at my sketchbook I found this from February this year. I think I was going put more then. Going for walks and not exactly seeing people but socialising more.

Then I pulled a calf muscle and it really knocked me back. I am seeing a lot less people and turning into a recluse. My walking consists of going to the shops a couple of times a day. This weekend I actually went to my art group meeting. I was trying to finish a dog painting and I used it as an excuse to get out the house and do some art. I think that has helped me break out a bit. My mojo needs to be released again!