One yellow leaf, fallen
Sitting with weeds and grass
Old brown leaves
Already over.
Leaves that turn to mulch
Rotting
Nutrients
Sinking
Into the ground
To renew next year
Feed the roots
To grow new shoots
After winters sleep.
Leaf
Tag: Time
Repetition
When you live with someone with bad hearing loss, be prepared to repeat yourself. Sometimes endlessly.
He has hearing aids, but he doesn’t always remember to put them in, and even when he does he can’t always hear me. I repeat things, but because he has lost the higher frequency sounds my voice can be too high to hear. We end up in a guessing game. I say a word say ‘splurge’ for instance, and he will say ‘Forge, force?’ I repeat, then ‘sort? Sports?’ repeat again, trying to pitch my voice lower…. ‘splits?’ finally he gets it. The energy it takes to communicate is hard work. Tiring. Irritating. But ultimately we communicate.
Mazed
My minds a maze
The world’s a haze
Memories topple
Like a worm in an apple.
Lost in a haze
Into distance I gaze
Thoughts that occur
Do not always concur.
Finding a thread
That just ends up dead
Seeing a face
But don’t know it’s place?
Older I get
The more…?
I forget.
Holding hands
Holding hands? After forty years we still do. But sometimes I just need to let go. When I’m typing, it’s impossible to type left handed. Impossible to chose the picture I want to use. Impossible to add tabs, categories. Sometimes you need a bit of freedom. The chance to do your own thing. Not tied together, feeling like you have to support the other one. It’s not just typing, it’s all the other things I would like to do, but I’m sure he feels the same way. Life, together, sometimes it’s hard to know when to let go (but stay together).
Thinking of Time
You can’t see the past or the future. You might be able to remember the past but it no longer exists as a physical thing. The future might be predicted, but it doesn’t exist yet.
I tried to imagine how it works. Like walking through a door or a window. The present would be a thin flat plain of glass with your body perhaps caught in it, and the past and the future would be ghostly after images of a leg or the impression of an arm projecting into the future….
Clearly it isn’t really like that. Our limbs don’t dissolve into a misty future or fall into a darkening landscape behind us. But it’s interesting to think about. We are ‘present’ in our present. We need to realise how strange the universe is. We need to care for our environment. We cannot see the future but we can try and make it safe for our future selves and generations.
Cat got out!
Loud rattling at the cat flap! Something trying to get in…. I went to open the door, but there was just darkness. I went back to preparing out evening meal. Then. More rattling. I went to the door and opened it, our boy cat was outside in the dark, trying to get back in. He dashed into the kitchen and proceeded to give me the biggest headbump ever. Just pleased to see me.
Talking to hubby, we decided he must have sneaked out when hubby went out to put some food in the shed for the hedgehogs.
Life gets everywhere
Even iin the cracks of windowledges or steps. This was growing at Spode last year. Not pretty, but green, seed heads developing, waiting to be dandelion clocks.
Next year there might be ten new plants, then a hundred the year after. Not exponential, but a creaping greening. A creating of new life, roots diving deep, breaking up the earth. If only we could embrace nature more? Not kill it but give it a helping hand. We know its wrong to harm the planet. Why do we persist.
Is it time?
Is it time?
Is it time to sleep?
To rest
and dream
or fear
with nightmare?
Is it time
you walk through the dark
no light on show.
Up the stairs
through the bedroom door,
ready to sleep,
wake no more
till dawning light
pierces your eyes
awake again
no more to lie.
No sleep,
wake fast
it’s time.
Goodnight.
college work
So much to do. My own fault really. I’m doing a college course but its been a while and I am acting like I did when I did my previous course. In other words prevaricating and not doing stuff in a timely way. But I know it so I’m trying to catch up. I still have a couple of weeks to put everything together, But you know when you are nervous. Its easier to come and type here than get on with things. Trouble is I am paying for this, so I’m letting myself down if I don’t get on with it. There you are- I’ve admitted it….
I tried making lists, sticking up post it notes, setting free time to do the work (I have plenty of that) my mind rebels! I look at the book of face, ring people, go for walks, garden….sound familiar? Do I really want to do this? Yes! I must get on with it..
Bye for now!
Have you seen this?
I’ve had this on a door for years, it’s getting sunburned and bleached, but it’s still there. A friend did the illustration and hand lettering for it. I’ve always thought it was an interesting piece of writing. I think I heard that it was not well thought of. That it was too middle class. But I like it. It makes me feel that people do care about each other.
X
Mallaband-Brown 