A few old sketches

Drawings from a few years ago at the Dorothy Clive garden that came up on my Facebook memories today. Happier days, when things were not so difficult. Sometimes time should be allowed to go backwards. Even if it’s like the film back to the future. A few hours to tweak the space time continuum. Then I could still be happy. But nil desperandum I need to get on with life. No regrets? I don’t think so.

Myself

Who do you spend the most time with?

It’s 6 months since he went (almost exactly). 6 months alone. Finding my way. The rest of my life? I was always with someone. Being a support and supporting. Now.. I see to myself and try and help others where I can.

When I do spend time with others it’s with good friends or members of groups that do activities I enjoy. But sometimes, I just want to be alone.

I guess I could live as a recluse, or alone on a desert island? I might not be good at finding food though. I would need someone to drop me off supplies or have a mild environment where plentiful food grew all year round. But how would I know what was safe to eat or drink? I’d need sterilising tablets or fire to boil water. Life isn’t simple when you are alone. Even in the simplest of environments. And when you live in an industrial society you are too estranged from real life and real survival skills.

My life is in a brick and mortar cave. I can survive here, but I still need to maintain it, look after it. Life is constantly changing. I appreciate company.

Movement

I’ve found through a bit of research that it’s important to keep moving if you have Parkinsons disease. So I wobble and shake my way along to the shops or to the pharmacy and back. Trying to get my slow steps in. I have looked at my movement counter but although I’m almost always getting a couple of thousand of steps in every day my heart rate barely registers!

What to do? Then someone from my surgery suggested a Parkinsons group that does table tennis (ping pong). I’d played this on the dining table at home as a young teenager and thought I’d have a go. My worker from the surgery came down to introduce me to the group a week ago. I needed that support because I find it hard to integrate with new people because of anxiety.

So..  I went, and found that I can hit a ping pong ball across a net! I was getting my feet tangled a bit and sort of felt rather static. But I could do it. I went back this week and I’m happy I can progress. I’m going to keep going. It’s only a fortnightly thing, but I hope it will be good for me. I ache in places I didn’t know I have though!

Eloise

If you had to change your name, what would your new name be?

Change my name, change my face…

Change my world.

Why Eloise? I just like the sound. I’m not even sure if I’ve spelt it correctly? If you add a U it becomes Elouise, which just sounds like you’ve misspelled Louise?

I also think it could be written e-loise… An electronic version of the name. Better than  e-louse (an AI version of a woodlouse?).

I was going to be Samantha, but I really don’t feel like I’m one of those. I think its too cuddly and feels like a princess name?

Eloise does sound rather proud and exotic? We all have our own ideas of how words work. Your favourite word might be something I hate. We mentally add connotations onto a word or a phrase. And I no no one called Eloise, I just like the sound… Am I strange?

Mystery?

For several years I was involved in a local community group that produced the Penkhull mystery plays. I was impressed by how the group wrote stories from scratch, made props like this green face, and organised music and stalls alongside the plays to make a wonderful mix of fun and theater for a local audience. I was  sometimes involved, helping paint scenery and took small parts in the plays.

Sadly the Pandemic stopped all of this and it’s taken a few years to try and come up with New Mysteries. Firstly we are putting on a small theatre performance called Harpers Titchy Theatre, with 3 minute plays, a few stalls and hopefully some music. The plan is that if this works we can put on a 20th anniversary year Penkhull Mystery Play in 2025. Wish us luck (or a broken leg)!