A top I bought ten or twelve years ago?

What’s the oldest things you’re wearing today?

It’s nylon and cotton. A maroon and white striped top. It has a couple of pockets. I bought it for work, I now wear it as something comfortable around the house.

Why not? I’ve lost weight, but it’s one of those baggy tops that doesn’t look bad even now. My thoughts are that I’m not bothered about fashion. If it fits and it looks OK I’m not bothered if its old. I don’t understand why people buy clothes every few months or weeks. I know people can get addicted to shopping. But in a time of austerity, why spend on clothes that might fall apart after a few washes. It’s also harmful to the environment to waste resources on clothes. If it covers you and keeps you warm? Then it’s OK.

I probably have older clothes, but I don’t remember when I bought them. They get washed on low temperatures, then folded and put away till I want them. Some are in a dusty cupboard, I might have some eighties classics!

Little bird drawing

Two versions, one digital drawings. When you have done something don’t be afraid to play with filters. It may or may not pay off, but you don’t know if you don’t try.

I need to get my paints out and do some real painting instead of doodling here. It’s OK, but a screen isn’t ideal for artwork. It gives me pleasure to do things, keeps my hand in, but it’s not much more than finger painting? Although looking at David Hockneys digital work it can be so much more. Just keep learning and practicing…

Putting up walls

It dawned on me this morning, the walls around me have grown… I’ve felt hemmed in by the pandemic, and tied down by ropes attached to concrete blocks. Not physically but mentally, emotionally, sadly.

Why? It stems from fear of what might happen. There is a word ‘catastrophise’ that I’ve heard recently. Maybe that’s what I’m doing. Plus hubbys situation bothers me, I feel very protective. Then again, as I age, bits of me don’t work properly. I tried to do something about it, but the authorities don’t seem to understand. It’s made me despondent to some extent. My prevarication is getting to me.

Sorry to lay all of this at your doors, I think by speaking out it allows me to order my thoughts. Those walls need to come down, and I need to let some light in, I need to be less of a scardey cat… But it’s not easy..

Potting bench

“We should be sitting on this!”

“But I need a table to pot on”

“Yes, but you have one”

“But it’s got my trains on”

“Well can you move them?”

“No, I’m making a layout, I got some ‘n’ gauge stock” “I want to build it up”.

Sigh, “OK but the plants can go in the garden, the bench needs varnish or something to protect it”.

I didn’t mention to hubby that the last bench was treated in the same way, the wood rotted and the bench collapsed. I bought new wooden slats, but ‘someone’ (hubby), nailed them on to something else….

Time management!

Not my artwork!

What’s one small improvement you can make in your life?

I need to start going to bed earlier. I’m always up late and it’s not good, then I get insomnia and I get up late. It’s a real dilemma to face. Not working also means I don’t have a routine to follow, and recent events have made me worse. I need to get out in the sunshine and boost my vitamin D but it’s easier to sit and feel anxious.

How do I do one thing to get me going again? Perhaps I should set my alarm every morning? Yes I could sleep through it, but at least it might give me the incentive to do things. Normally by the time I get up its after noon….

Why? Social media to some extent, and a constant need to watch the news. I’m caught in that dopamine trap of wanting to keep checking my phone, and yet I want to break away from it. I don’t read click bait but I do look at sites about politics a lot. I’m well informed. But why? it just ups the anxiety levels..

STOP!

Look into my eyes

I was just watching a programme called ‘Glow up’ about make up artists competing to win a make up artist of the year award. They are all young, enthusiastic people and the work they did was amazing. The first challenge was to create fresh makeup for an advertising campaign. The results were varied between very subtle and very bold. The second challenge was to create a make up which represented the place the contestants came from. One competitor came up with a bee for Manchester on her models nose, and eagles wings using feathers on the models eyebrows.

I’ve never seen this programme before on BBC 1, but I’m glad I did. I have done a small amount of face-palming in the past but this was on an entirely different scale. Really amazing and artistic! My sketch here is nothing in comparison. X

Found

Acrylic on canvas painting, work in progress. Of trees and rocks or stones. But I don’t remember what I was doing with it. I found it in the summerhouse while I was helping clear it up. I must have started it sometime last year. Perhaps in the winter. I’ll have to make a story up? Maybe it was too cold in there and the water froze, or the weather changed and continuous rain put me off. I’m going to get my brushes out and try and finish it off….