Eyeballing you

I found a toy eyeball ball, a very bouncy ball that I must have bought years ago. I jazzed it up with a few gold stripes on its iris. Then I put it on top of my sequined makeup bag… I tried various filters to bring out the details. That’s the second photo. Again it’s just me playing with images to make something slightly spooky this time.

I’m a follower

Do you see yourself as a leader?

You’ll find me at the back of a crowd. My legs are little and I can’t keep up with big people’s strides. I’ve never been a leader, I think my imposter syndrome stops me thinking I could be! I’ve never been massively confident and I always question my abilities, plus to be a leader you have to have charisma and I not sure I do.

A leader seems to have overwhelming faith in themselves and I don’t know if I could do that, it almost feels like leaders fool themselves into it. Or are bought up to be important and think they are the best.

I guess my view is quite negative, but considering how politicians act and deceive to get power then it must be understandable. Clearly there are other types of leader, religious, royal, a head of a company for instance, I’m sure there is good amongst them, but there also appears to be a ruthless streak. Maybe it’s from childhood sibling rivalry, or being an only child.

Finally would I like to be a leader? Maybe I could do it, I’ve chaired meetings in the past, but honestly? I’m old enough not to relish it.

Golden calf

Old photo of the golden calf which is next to the Chinese garden and temple at Biddulph Grange garden a National Trust property. Near to it is a huge and grotesque stone frog. I guess the place is so eccentric that it’s worth several visits just to take it all in. There are garden rooms and buildings that are so spectacular. It’s hard to think the Grange was once a hospital for TB patients.

I must visit again before the end of the summer.

No sleep

Nothing helped last night, counting backwards, trying breathing techniques, listening to the radio on very quietly. I couldn’t get comfortable, the bed cover was wrinkled, I kept getting cramp.

I’m surrounded by three cats, one on an armchair, one on the settee, which was getting in the way of my legs, one on the cat tree. I just realised they are being supportive. I know it sounds strange, but they have become much more attentive since my injury.

I’m going to make a warm decaff coffee and try and sleep…

And yet I’m just listening to the awful news about the flooding in Libya and the Earthquake in Morocco. My problem is nothing compared with that. The world is a cruel place.

Experimenting

What’s your favorite word?

I love experimenting, the word and the action. I’m interested in science and often watch the Royal Institution Christmas lectures where different sciences, from biology, to engineering, forensic science to astronomy. These are described during each series of lectures. Part of the explanation is done through experiments completed with the help of audience members.

I also love experimenting in art, to the extent that I call myself an experimental fine artist. I enjoy working on an image until I get to an outcome that speaks to me. I don’t think I overwork things, and I do know when to stop, but sometimes I go back and tweak things, change things. I might end up with several images that all mean something to me, then I have to decide which I prefer. My use of digital apps has extended my experimental experiences.

Art experiments

Progression from original digital drawing to filtered /distorted images. Using Artrage and then photodirector and Instagram filters. I do love to experiment with digital art. I like pushing the envelope as they say…

I could have used more colour but I tried a black and white filter after I drew the original and used a filter on Instagram that allows you to tilt and twist images.