Facing my fears

Six year old sketch

This came up on Facebook memories and I thought it was so close to how I’m feeling now. Jangling nerves, my heartbeat spikey, thoughts all over the place moving at a million miles a second. Suspicious of everyone. Anxiety and tiredness mixed into a morass of stress. It’s been a bad few days and I don’t know if it’s going to get better. Fingers crossed.

Artrage oils digital drawing.

Fear

I tried to draw an abstract image of fear. Everything is chaotic, your not in control, tight chest and gut. Swirling colours…

I’m not afraid of halloween or anything silly like that, but I’m scared to go out into our garden without my hubby. We have been through a series of thefts from our garden and now I can’t stop looking out of the window to check if anyone had come back. Hubby just rushed out because he saw someone on a bike like his, and I’m afraid to go into the garden incase someone is lurking, so many bad thoughts of what might happen!

Hence the drawing, a bit of self art therapy.

Settle to Carlisle line

Another image drawn on holiday, this one is from 1994 whan we were on holiday near Settle. We cycled around the area and I did this sketch in biro when we stopped to have lunch and look at the view I think. But this was 29 years ago so I may have misremembered. By looking at the notes it looks like I revisited in the October of the same year.

90s drawing

90s drawing of a sequoia bald eagle. I think we were on holiday in the lake district and called in at a bird sanctuary. It’s in a sketchbook that I just found while trying to declutter. We used to take the train up to Manchester and then cycle to Rochdale, then catch a train up to the south Lake District and then tour and cycle camp or stay at Youth Hostels. I must have been fit!