First Night

Paddy, one of my set paintings

Tonight was the first performance of the opera, Who is Molly Leigh?

I enjoyed singing in the choir and got to watch a couple of scenes. We sing in the final scene and question who Molly Leigh was? Was she real, was she a myth? It’s amazing how it’s all come together. I’m pleased to say the audience enjoyed it.

I’m absolutely shattered now! I went to the fish and chip shop to get tea because I’m to tired to microwave something, but it’s going cold in the kitchen because I sat down and I’m too achy to get back up! Might have a nap.

Sleep (lack of)

I wanted to sleep

Curl up and rest

Each hour I don’t

Makes me feel wretched

Too hot, too cold

My feet hurt, my neck aches

Sleeping on an armchair

Doesn’t really work.

But my ribs hurt

If I lie down.

Broken a fortnight or more ago

Still mending.

Walk round my room

Make a warm drink

Put the radio on low

Turn it off

Legs ache

Feet swell

Impossible

Doze above flying feilds

…….

Snap awake

The builders just started work

Next door

Whimpering.

Down

People aren’t around, and if they were I don’t want to bother them. Some memories have been arriving on my Facebook page and I remembered what fun I was having ten years ago. People were there then, a group who worked together. Work was OK, life was satisfying.

Now? I feel shattered, broken, I’ve caught myself crying a few times. I’ve got things planned for later on, so I hope I’ll be OK. Life is up and down at the moment. I’m sharing this here because it’s better to get things off your chest. I need to unstick myself and stop thinking about things. But worries assert themselves.

This was triggered by adverts for funeral plans and wills on the TV and seeing seven or eight police cars and an ambulance up the hill last night. What happened? Are people OK? Nothing in the news, but anxiety bites again.

Longest days

I’ve just spent two days working with BArts and Growthpoint. They were putting on an opera show about Molly Leigh.

There were three scenes today, a church where a vicar was criticising a local woman called Molly Leigh and saying she was a witch, turning milk sour and having a blackbird as a familiar. A pub scene where there were  customers and staff gossiping and talking about Molly saying good and bad things, like she borrowed money and didn’t pay it back, but then gave a family with a sick child several pints of milk so the child recovered. Then the final scene where a community choir came together to sing from her perspective bringing out the various aspects of her life. Each choir member was playing part of Molly as a whole.

The photo is of the cottage interior with a few of my bits of painting included. I have to say it was hard work, tiring, very intense and yet life affirming. I did more in two days than I’ve been able to for a few years and now I’m absolutely shattered.

Scenery

So tired,

A day full of painting ad singing, I was helping with the Molly Leigh project at BArts. I offered to paint a picture for a wall in the witches cottage, I ended up painting a fireplace too. I only did the morning as I wanted to join the choir and to be honest I was so stiff and tired after I’d been painting I almost fell asleep in my chair!

Ugh!

Yesterday I walked into town, which isn’t far, got some shopping and walked home on my own. Then I contacted a firm to sort something out, then we went to the doctors to get out flu vaccine and finally I joined a choir practice for a Christmas concert. Two hours of Loud singing!

That was more in one day than I’d done in six weeks. But I was feeling stubborn and I’m fed up of being off my feet.

But all I’ve done today is fetch the milk in. I’m shattered. My poorly leg and feet are aching, my arm is shaking and sore, and I just want to sleep.

Could it be the result of the flu jab? I don’t think so, I usually don’t have a reaction. No, I think its because I tried to overdo things yesterday. I shall continue to rest today, then attempt more tomorrow.

Tired out

I finally managed to get to sleep at about 9.30am! Then I slept fitfully till 11am woke up, had a decaff coffee went back to bed and finally got up just before 2pm. What an awful night. I am very tired and I don’t even know if I will be able to get some rest tonight. I don’t want to moan about it. I’ve been in a bad mood today, I’m going to see if I can go to bed early. We will see. Words like shattered, exhausted, insomnia, wrecked, knackered and weary spring to mind.

Snow and sun

Blurry back yard, the plants have been watered and are starting to grow. But the snow showered us today. Cold winds blew, and the outdoor cat came in to get warm.

Health wise I went to the shop, but after walking just 2 km I was absolutely shattered. Still that’s 2km more than I’ve done for the last two days! I hope I’ll be able to do more tomorrow….