Tag: Exhausted?

Climbing

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Today I felt like I climbed a mountain…. I was rehearsing with the choir that is putting on a Christmas show tomorrow in the church. For weeks we have sung in the choir stalls near the altar, which was easy enough to move around. But last night they bought in a stage made of a metal framework and a flat top. It had a step up to it. That’s great but I struggled to climb up onto it. My Parkinsons makes me feel like I’m teetering forward and over balancing, which, added to vertigo, made me feel very unsafe.

The compromise was to sit or stand at the side of the stage, then walk up and round some steps behind the choir stalls to come out by the altar. Three steps, not as steep, but in almost complete darkness, which bought out my anxiety again. I hauled myself up the steps and dropped down them on the way back, making my knees hurt.

After eight or ten of these trips I was shattered. The show is the cast singing big songs interspersed with individual solos. It was very tiring. I felt like I’d climbed a mountain. So as a compromise during the performance I will mostly be sitting in the main church, just moving to the side of the stage for the ensemble songs… As I say I’m shattered!

I keep sleeping

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What a day! After a busy morning trying to sort a few things out, I had some lunch, then found myself falling asleep in front of the TV. Later a friend rang up so I helped her work out how to fit a firestick to her TV. I looked it up on Google and got her to find the HDMI cable, we then spent an hour trying to sort out how it worked. I joked I would never be able to talk down a plane in distress! Ten minutes later another friend rang about a burst pipe, asking if I could help in some way. She doesn’t have a computer so I gave her some numbers of local plumbers. We spoke for so long that my phone went flat.

Then, I don’t know if I was mentally exhausted but I just fell asleep, then slept on and off till now. I must have missed half of the programmes on TV. I never saw the end of Oliver! the movie. I need to wake up to cook something for tea, I might just have some noodles.

Bad stats!

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Oh dear, I’m not on line as much and my stats are going down. I’ve been in choir performances over the last few days and by the time I get home I’m usually exhausted and fall asleep. At the moment I’ve nodded of a few times, I can hardly stay awake.

My neighbours hammering at 7am in the morning which doesn’t help. I think he is knocking the plaster off the walls of his kitchen where it is damp. Anyway I’ll write more later x

Forgot to add a title I’m so tired!

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Paintings from the weekend. The central painting was done previously but the rest, smaller ones, were painted over the previous three days. I was happy with the outcome. Unfortunately I only sold one, my excuse? Gale force winds and heavy rain made for a grim  morning. Thankfully it improved in the afternoon. But we only had a few customers.

Today? It’s caught up with me! I’m shattered, tired, absolutely knackered. Just fell asleep typing this!

He used to ring me…

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Hubby used to ring me from work in the evenings, he worked a late shift for several years. He didn’t go out to work till the afternoon and came home after midnight. I worked a day shift, so we really only saw each other over a late night meal or at weekends. Then his firm changed the shifts, so he had to start an hour later and finish later too. They also made the workers take a day off in the week and have to work Sunday mornings too. It was awful. That telephone call was our only communication in the evening.

He hated the job and was being bullied. He went to work on a motorbike and a few times when he got home late he was so exhausted he would fall off it. He used to say that he did more work than two people. Sometimes they would take on new workers but they could not keep up with him and some would not come in the next day because they could not cope.

I was so glad when he finished there. We managed to spend few good years together before he died.

I realise now why I can cope without him in the evenings, I spent so many years waiting for him to come home, and that’s why I struggle to sleep at night, my mind expects him to return later.

Scenery

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So tired,

A day full of painting ad singing, I was helping with the Molly Leigh project at BArts. I offered to paint a picture for a wall in the witches cottage, I ended up painting a fireplace too. I only did the morning as I wanted to join the choir and to be honest I was so stiff and tired after I’d been painting I almost fell asleep in my chair!

I would meditate!

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If you didn’t need sleep, what would you do with all the extra time?

Yawn, I need some rest!

I think I would use the extra time to relax and try and relieve stress. Otherwise if I was to stay awake I would try and do too much, use up all my energy and end up exhausted.

It’s a strange concept to think about being happy not to sleep. As someone who suffers from insomnia (typing this at 1am), the thought of not needing to sleep both enchants and worries me. I enjoy dreams and would miss them. But if I could survive without sleep I could also be more creative. Perhaps meditate on art and different styles.

If people could stay awake indefinitely what would they get up to? How many more Police and security staff would we need. Would pollution go up if staff were expected to work 24/7 or would they have time to pursue leisure activities? I think it would be a strange, busy and manic world.

Cutting back Russian vine

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Don’t plant this thuggish, invasive plant! We planted two of them ten years ago and they can scramble and climb forty feet or more in a season! It dies back and leaves tangled vines in the winter but it can grow tough ropey tendrils in the summer. A true triffid of a plant. Hubby was up a ladder dragging filaments of it out from underneath the shed roof and from the alleyway behind our house. It needs more work but it was exhausting for him. I’m tired and all I did was steady the ladder!