Young at heart

Hubby on a swing we found, at the edge of a field a couple of years ago on a country walk. Soon he was flying up to the sky! Luckily the rope didn’t give way.

When covid was going on we actually went walking more, getting away from the city and people, then when lock down ended we continued but with more friends. This was one of those occasions.

Later I stopped walking as much after badly pulling a muscle, but we were trying to get back into walking when I trapped my leg in the car door and that resulted in a wound that took months to heal. We were just getting back into walking when my hubbys health deteriorated and he passed away. The universe seems against me!

I think I need company to get back out again. I don’t like walking on my own, easier to hide.

Singing for health

I went to choir this morning. It’s one for lung health but I go because my friend goes and more and more for my mental health too.

I’ve been through a lot of crisises lately and I feel like I’m in the middle of a crescendo of music at the moment, will the wall of sound collapse and calm down, or turn into a tsunami of torment? Awaiting test results to find out.

I finally got a long awaited hospital appointment through, I’m hoping something will be sorted out, but I’m nervous of the outcome.

Meantime? I will keep singing at choirs, trying  to keep my spirits and endorphins up. I will try and keep calm in the middle of a whirling cacophony of worry!

Morning cat

Snoozing cat having a lie in after a night on the tiles? He snores, he dreams, paws twitching. He greets me with a little purr. I think I have got three familiars (I have two other cats). They all have different traits but they are all very loving.

I don’t name them on here because of online security. I could call them all by pseudonym, but I don’t think it matters. They are big, medium and small!

This is big (used to be ‘outside’ cat), he sometimes pushes the cat flap door loose because he has got quite fat. He has a barrel shaped belly and seems quite content. When we first met him as an abandoned cat he was already an adult, I guess he’s over 13 years old now. Middle aged and happy.

Patriotic?

Are you patriotic? What does being patriotic mean to you?

I think I am patriotic, but not in a strong way. I disagree with acting in a xenophobic way. I think arguing that one race should rule one country isn’t right. I believe there is good and bad in all people’s and countries. Also there should be fairness to all. Attacking people because they are different is not a good thing to do.

Think about it, humans draw borders on maps, lines in the sand, rivers that seperate one place from another. But when you look at where humans came from in Africa, and how they spread out across the Earth, there was always movement. People gradually changed depending on the climate and amount of sunlight. In hotter countries skin colour was darker to protect skin. In Northern climbs lighter because of the lack of sun. I know it doesn’t completely fit that pattern, but I guess through evolution other changes occurred.

Once there is a slight difference in appearance or language it’s easy to get into an ‘us or them’ situation. We have probably always warred but I think its time the human race grew up. Learnt to be tolerant and fought for fairness not patriotic excuses such as invading neighbouring countries. Race, religion, money, fear can all cause problems, but sometimes strong patriotism can make it much worse.

First haircut since lock down!

My friend came round and gave my hair a trim today (another friend has also offered).

I was sitting in my dressing gown keeping warm, when a friend rang up. Do you want a haircut? I thought about it. Yes why not. She arrived twenty minutes later with scissors and comb. Ten minutes later and I felt lighter and neater. No fuss with washing and drying, no conditioner. I’d washed my hair already. I tried cutting my fringe (why do Americans call a fringe  bangs?) but I couldn’t really see it properly so she finished it off.

Midway through the cut another friend rang, so I rang her back and chatted about this and that. All the company tired me out, but I’m glad they got in touch. Now I’m surrounded by hungry cats. A reason to go shopping in a bit. Life, you can’t always hide.

Everything!

Do you need a break? From what?

For those that follow my blog you will know I’ve been going through a couple of bad years. I really want things to stop going wrong. I feel like the universe is jumping up and down on my head. I’d like a break. That’s just a few days where I can relax and recover.

Holidays, that’s a word I don’t think I will hear in the future. I have ‘leisure time’ but that’s just sitting being bored because I don’t have anything I can do or want to do. I’ve spent years looking after someone and I’d love to have that responsibility back. The silence is deep sometimes. Thinking is not a ‘break’. We would talk and chat, breaking that silence with serious thoughts or silly humour. I could always make him laugh.. There is no laughter now.

Low sky

Outside our back door this evening. The sky looked pinker than this to my eyes, but I have to go with what the camera shows. Out anemometer on the weather station was spinning round merrily in the gusty wind (it was almost a dark and stormy evening!) it’s not linked in with the station in the house as the batteries are dead! I do like the salmon pink sky. I wish we lived on the sunny side of the hill.

Getting rid of clutter

Something on your “to-do list” that never gets done.

I promise myself

To get rid of clutter

But it piles up

More comes through the door

And more and more

Not neat and tidy

Not filed in folders

But piled in boxes

On cupboards

On a chair

On the sofa

In bags.

Oh heavens

Will I ever declutter?

Power cut fixed phone

My landline stopped working a few months ago, no matter what I did I couldn’t delete the saved messages and calls. It just said another handset was in use (I don’t have one?).

I had been to the local store to see if they had a similar device, but there was too much choice and I didn’t know what would work as none seemed to have the features I wanted.

Then this morning an alarm went off across the road. This usually signifies a power failure. But my landline phone beeped… I investigated. It said it was synchronising, when it stopped I checked and I could delete everything, calls and answerphone logs. It no longer says Full. I tried ringing it. For the first time in months it rang. Now all I need to do is make sure the memory doesn’t get full. And now I just need to reset the clocks on my stove and alarm clock!

Old oil painting

1980s large canvas. Painted in oils, it was only a few years later that I started using acrylics instead. It’s about 5 ft by 4 ft or something like that. It depicts our old front room, in the house we used to live in. The cellar underneath the front room was starting to collapse, its vaulted ceiling held up with an acroprop. Why was I painting a giant cat? Because I love them, and patterns (wallpaper, clothes etc). The small cat in the corner is playing with a roll of wool. The box says Walsall Art supplies, where I came from. I’d call this a narrative painting.