Lots of things

What bothers you and why?

The world seems upside down inside out

I’m bothered by lots of things.. about

Broken tiles

Corrupt files

Parking woes

A split hose

Not enough bees

Leaves leaving trees

Too hot one day

Too cold the next day

Inconvenient thoughts

Complicated sports

Not enough food

Having a low mood.

They all bother me

I guess that’s how I see

The world

Unfurled.

Shattered

Two years ago I was down in Falmouth.

Now I’m tired all the time, I try and do things and end up shattered.

I get fed up of having to take tablets everyday. Sometimes they have to be tweaked to adjust how my body copes with things. Currently I’ve stopped one type of tablet and have started on something new. All this takes time to get used to.

Life consists of doing a few things to try and keep contact with friends, but not really being able to cope with day to day tasks. My sister bought me a jar and bottle gripper a few weeks ago. It’s been a godsend because I’ve lost strength in my arms and hands. People of a certain age will have heard of Pansy Potter, the strong man’s daughter. I used to be really strong and, able to pick up heavy weights or open tightly closed jars, what happened to me? I’ve suddenly realised I have got old. I don’t mind looking old, but I wish I was able to get back some of my fitness. I know it’s important to keep moving if you have Parkinsons, but it’s hard when you feel tired. I want to go back in time. I want my life back.

Sorry, moaning over.

Tea?

One of my old digital drawings I did a few years ago on a website called sketchfu that has sadly closed. Each week we were set a challenge to draw from a photo. I got quite good at it even though there were only a few tools on the site. I’d like to know what pottery the set was made at. I think it looks quite neat.

Heat pumps?

Air conditioner. Not a heat pump.

I think an air sourced heat pump is like an air conditioning unit in reverse. Apparently as gas use diminishes they could be the new source of heating here in British homes.

So when I saw an advert for it on Facebook I thought I would check out the information. I clicked on the page, but got taken to a website that wanted me to accept cookies and probably sign up for something I’m not sure about?

Am I being paranoid? Probably, but after all the miselling of various schemes over the years I think my attitude is justified.

I left this comment :

‘I need to know the approximate costs. I don’t want to be taken to a website where I will probably be bombarded by adverts. Is it too much to ask for a simple chart to explain the costs and benefits honestly?’

I think that makes my point.

Who’s coming to dinner?

If you could host a dinner and anyone you invite was sure to come, who would you invite?

I’d like to invite Albert Einstein, Marie Curie, Carl Sagan and Richard Feynman.

I don’t know if I would be able to understand any conversation between them. But I have noticed that the three men seemed to have funny senses of humour. The two I know most about were Feynman (one of his books is Surely you’re joking Mr Feynman) and Sagan (who wrote Cosmos and Contact among other books).

All of them were interesting people and I hope they would take pity on my lack of knowledge of Physics and the other sciences. Maybe it would be a difficult meal to host. I would research the food they liked and try and replicate it, but I would have to be careful not to cause them stomach problems!

Anyway it’s never going to happen. Fun imagining the guest list though.

Singing

Do you sing for pleasure, to earn money, to learn something new? Or for mental or physical health?

Singing is good for lung health. It can strengthen both your lungs, chest muscles and help improve your voice. It helps with breathing and can help control your worries. I’ve found it helpful with controlling anxiety. It doesn’t cure it, but it calms it. Yes you could get stage fright, but singing with a choir helps because you are singing with others and that supports all the participants. You learn together and grow together. After about 20 years of singing with the group we sound pretty good. New people join and the group changes, but we all enjoy going or we wouldn’t be there

Some songs are earworms, rolling round and round in your head. Others are hard to pick up. We sometimes drop a tone or sing flat. It’s hard as a low singer to hit the high notes. Some songs are really annoying, but others in the group love them. But as we are all different then we all like a variety of music. Participating is good for you. I’d recommend it to anyone.

No cherries, no pears

Each year we have cherries and pears on our trees. The birds get most of the cherries but we get good pears, that is until  this year.

We had a lovely display of blossom. The cherry and the pear tree blossomed first. Early in spring. Lots of flowers, pink and white. But I was worried because it was cold and wet and windy and I didn’t see many insects (and we don’t seem to have had birds nesting either). A couple of weeks later the blossom had faded and petals showered the ground. Then the apple tree came into blossom. The sun shone and bees arrived. Now I have no cherries, I saw the little stalks with tiny pips all over the ground, and no discernable baby pears. It’s so sad. It’s like they have given up now hubby is gone.

My only consolation is that there are lots of apples on the tree. But it hangs over into my neighbours yard and I am worried they will cut it back, and as there is a trellis fence in the way I can’t access the fruit. Drat!

Do not go gentle

My hubby was born in the year that Welsh poet Dylan Thomas died and he was always admiring of Dylans poetry. Hubby had a wonderfully strong speaking voice, and I know there are cassette tapes somewhere in the house of him reciting Dylans poetry and short stories.

When we first met he played me “the burning baby”, a macabre story by Thomas that sent shivers down my back and raised goosebumps on my arms. It was mesmerising to listen to hubby read it, and he howled at the end with gusto. I think he should have been on the radio as a performer.

I just came in from shopping and suddenly the poem “Do not go gentle” by Dylan Thomas came into my memory. I’ve looked it up and copied it. It was read out by a friend at my hubbies celebration of his life. He had always loved it and I hope he would have been pleased that it was performed.

Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

If you can, try and listen to a recording of Dylan Thomas reading it. X