Toast at 4am

It’s another one of those nights. I lie down to sleep but my thoughts churn. I’m too hot, then too cold. I tried reading but hubby wants the light out, then he starts to snore. I came downstairs to get a drink, decaffeinated coffee, what a thrill?! I decided to treat myself to a slice of toast with hummus. Not very exciting. I know that at this rate it will be afternoon before I get up. One of the cats is on the armchair next to me, paw over his nose, keeping the light from the standard lamp out of his eyes. Oh to be a cat, curling up wherever you can. Warmed in a fur coat that is totally ethical. The house creaks at night, it’s old and not very well made. I think of my sister late at night. My chest does ache, but it might just be the cold I’ve had for the last few days. I guess I’ve got to learn to live with the loss. I’m still mourning her. Maybe tomorrow night I’ll get a better night’s sleep.

Hot buttered toast

When you get up after two hours lying awake at four o’clock in the morning and need comfort food. A lightly toasted slice of white bread and the spread of your choice, and a decaffeinated beverage helps. The first thing I thought last night when I woke up was ‘toast’, I’d got to take a tablet, and I didn’t want to take it on an empty stomach. I remember making toast for people for breakfast in one of my jobs. When all the residents had had theirs we were allowed a slice of toast and a cup of tea. A five minute rest in a hectic morning. And doesn’t it look good enough to eat? I’ve managed to get about three hours sleep in total and all I want to do is get back to bed. But the toast was lovely.