Dear Agony Aunt,

My sleep patterns have stayed the same for twenty years. Staying up late was to do with being awake when my husband got in from work around 1am. I would then have to get up for work in the morning so was always tired. He could sleep in later as he was on a permanent “noon” shift. Now however he goes to bed a lot earlier than me. If I go to bed early I have to read to relax and then I can nod off. He, on the other hand, must be in a different time zone to me. He goes to bed if I have to go out in the evening. The last two nights when I got in he was in bed by 9.30pm.

Great you say. But then he woke up at 2am as I was coming to bed and we ended up chatting till 4am. It was getting light.

So Dear Agony Aunt, what do I do? Eschew grown up bedtimes and go to bed early. This would have the effect of trying to get us back in sync, but I would have to miss late night TV and news. Or should I just go to bed when I want, which would at least prevent me lying in bed trying to get to sleep for hours. I’m hoping this is a phase. My hubby is getting older but he lives on nervous energy, he’s always moving and talking in the day, and it’s like his batteries have drained in the evening. Maybe I should make him strong coffee….